Chapter 94: Ji Xian, Stop Deceiving Yourself

Everyone thought Jixian had lost his mind, completely and utterly.

Even the boys who had once been certain that Qiaozhen would come back now thought his mental state was deeply troubling.

It was nothing but self-deception.

Was Qiaozhen’s rejection not obvious enough?

At first, when it came time to eat, she refused to sit with Jixian. Calmly and seriously, she said, “From now on, I won’t be joining you anymore.”

Back then, no one took it seriously. As always, they mocked her and put her down.

During the basketball game, Qiaozhen did not even spare them a glance. She even brought water to Qin Yichi, her eyes filled only with him.

If that could still be called playing hard to get, a little drama, a calculated trick—

Then on Jixian’s birthday, Qiaozhen did not inquire as she had in previous years, but directly blocked every one of their contacts.

At school, when they cornered her against a wall and demanded to know why, she met them with wary resolve. “I said it before. I have nothing to do with you anymore.”

By then, things had already begun to slip beyond their control.

They could also feel that Jixian was getting anxious.

During an elective course at school, he abandoned his usual ice-cold, untouchable manner and took the initiative to ask Qiaozhen to team up with him.

But Qiaozhen refused without hesitation, her gaze utterly indifferent, repeating each word with deliberate seriousness: “I’m not willing.”

Later still, Jixian went so far as to make the first move in plain sight, giving Qiaozhen two tickets for a private ski trip in Zermatt, Switzerland. Yet Qiaozhen tore them into pieces before their eyes and threw them into the trash.

Was that still not obvious enough? Not decisive enough?

Qiaozhen had long since stopped liking him. She had long since made up her mind to have nothing to do with him.

The boys recalled Madame Ji’s warning and exchanged another glance. Then they nodded and rushed forward to stop him, wailing as though in despair:

“Mr. Ji... really, don’t go. What kind of woman can you not have? If Qiaozhen is gone, then she’s gone.”

“Exactly, stop deceiving yourself. Wake up, please, I’m begging you, my lord!”

No matter how they tried to hold him back, Jixian’s eyes remained bloodshot, his chest rising and falling violently. He shook off their hands with force, his tone chilling to the bone. “Get lost. All of you, get lost!”

His lips pressed into a straight line, without the slightest curve, and an unmistakable coldness radiated from every inch of him.

Self-deception? Impossible.

In those dreamlike fragments from his past life, Qiaozhen had held a heart full of sincerity and chased after him for seven years. Seven whole years. And that was only the small portion he had dreamt of. For all he knew, in his previous life Qiaozhen might have followed him for more than ten years, maybe even for all her life.

None of them knew these things. Only he did.

So it was they who did not understand, they who failed to comprehend. How could he be deceiving himself?

Jixian’s expression darkened and lightened by turns. He strode out of the banquet hall, his steps brisk and urgent, determined to find Qiaozhen.

At worst, he would lower himself a little and bring Qiaozhen back to his side.

He would agree to her. He would agree to be with her. He would never again deliberately provoke her, test her, or cold-shoulder her the way he had before.

Yes, as long as he did that, it would be enough!

As he hurried along, Jixian kept comforting himself.

He burst out of the banquet hall, a chill radiating from him as he walked faster and faster.

Then suddenly, he froze in place.

More than a dozen bodyguards surrounded him without expression, while Madame Ji stood before him, elegant and imposing in a dignified, exquisite dark red cheongsam, advancing step by step.

Her bearing was refined, but her eyes were cold, devoid of even a trace of warmth, as if she were appraising a tool.

“What are you trying to leave early for?”

This was not the concern or worry a mother would normally show her son. Her voice was full of thorns and mockery.

Jixian clenched his fists, his voice low. “I have private matters—”

Smack!

The next second, a searing slap landed hard across his face, the crisp crack of skin on skin echoing sharply.

Red fingerprints burned into that haggard face, growing ever clearer.

Madame Ji let out a soft laugh, her expression dripping with scorn, her tone cold and humiliating. “All for a woman, and you’ve become this lost?”

What did Jixian look like now? Worn and exhausted, his eyes scattered and vacant, his mind wandering all day long as if possessed.

In the past, he had always been proud and aloof, never showing his emotions, handling everything with effortless ease.

“You useless thing. I raised you for nothing!”

The harsh words were like a basin of ice water poured from head to toe, extinguishing the fire in his heart completely.

Cold. So cold...

Only after a very long time did Jixian finally come to himself.

His lips moved, his throat dry. “I understand.”

His body turned like a machine, and he mechanically lifted his feet, returning to the banquet once more, his figure desolate and forlorn.

Just like the past twenty years of his life: cold and numb....

At the start of March, the ice and snow melted away, and the weather gradually warmed, slowly opening the prelude to all things awakening.

University of Capital resumed classes, and students returned to campus one after another with suitcases and heavy bags on their backs.

After waiting so long for the term to begin, Jixian finally had time to go find Qiaozhen again.

Only when he finally bothered to have someone look for her did he suddenly realize that, in truth, they had very little intersection and were not so easy to run into.

He had always thought it easy to encounter Qiaozhen. Whether in high school or during those first two or three months after entering university, it seemed as though he could always see her, see that sparkling look in her eyes.

She had been like a small animal quietly following behind him, impossible to shake off, always visible the moment he turned around.

But now, if he did not deliberately check her schedule, he could only catch a distant glimpse of her. He could no longer get close to her, could no longer find her....

The boy beside him looked troubled and said awkwardly, “Mr. Ji... this... Madame Ji won’t let us help you find her. I really don’t dare. Last time I don’t even know who tipped them off—I got a warning call.”

“And besides, Qiaozhen she... she already has a boyfriend. There are plenty of girls chasing you at school, too. Why not take a look at them, haha.”

The boy quickly changed the subject, his mind trampling through a thousand curses.

That couple had just started dating, sweet as anything, stuck to each other like glue all day long, going to the cafeteria together, the library together, and joining activities together.

Was there something wrong with Jixian’s brain that he had to break them up?

The boy secretly lifted his head to watch Jixian’s reaction.

The other man ignored him entirely, calm before the storm, expressionless, his tone stubborn.

“So what if Qiaozhen is with Qin Yichi now? They grew up together. If she liked him, they would have been together long ago. Why wait until now?”

Though he seemed to be speaking to someone else, he was really brainwashing himself.

The more Jixian spoke, the more confident he became, the more animated. His reasoning grew more and more certain.

“Because her true feelings are not with Qin Yichi at all. A relationship without love is doomed not to last. They’ll break up sooner or later, don’t you understand!”

The boy: “...”

Jixian was unwilling to give up. Clenching his fists, he headed alone toward the girls’ dormitory, wanting to try his luck.

It was past nine in the evening. Night had fallen, and faint stars hung high overhead.

The leaves of the plane trees around him rustled softly, while dim lights along the roadside cast a weak glow, stretching his lonely, desolate figure endlessly long.

Suddenly, he stopped in his tracks.

In front of the dormitory entrance, Qiaozhen stood in a beige nightdress, seeming to wait for something, her face bright with anticipation.

Jixian’s gaze shifted, surprise and delight flashing in his eyes. He hurriedly lifted a foot to walk over, but in the next instant, his entire body stiffened.

A tall figure suddenly darted out from another path and raced over.

Unrestrained, flashy, and fervent.

Qin Yichi carried a dessert bag in his hand and placed it into Qiaozhen’s arms, his brows and eyes smiling.

He seemed to have some sort of restless energy, rubbing Qiaozhen’s head one moment, pinching her cheek the next, then tugging at her hand, the corners of his mouth lifted so high he could not suppress them.

The two spoke intimately to each other, as if even the air around them had turned tender and ambiguous, drawing silk-like threads between them bit by bit.

The night was as dark as ink. One streetlamp after another lit up across the campus with warmth and romance, enveloping them and forming a harmonious painting.

And Jixian stood not far away, behind a notice board and in the shadow where the light could not reach, like a dark, furtive rat.

As if they had been sealed off into two completely different worlds.

Jixian stared in disbelief at the scene before him. For some reason, his eyes burned, and his lips gradually lost all color, turning pale and weak. His chest rose and fell violently.

Not far away, Qiaozhen held the dessert gift bag. After hesitating for a moment, she puffed out her cheeks and secretly looked around.

Once she confirmed there was no one nearby, she suddenly rose onto her tiptoes—

And took the initiative to kiss Qin Yichi on the cheek.

In that instant, Jixian froze where he stood, his eyes crimson red, while a roar rang out in his ears.